I need to apologize for my last post. It was blurry, unedited, and totally lacking in decorum. But I was so overwhelmed with emotions and just had to share it with someone. Anyone. Everyone. I was experiencing my first demolition derby and it was euphoric.
It's now a day later and the buzz has worn off and I am thinking clearly again. I'm sorry you had to see that side of me, be it ever so brief and out of focus. It won't happen again.
Having said that, it was A. May. Zing.
Ever been? You should totally go.
Wait, what? You've been? Are you trying to tell me that you all are veteran derby-ers and HAVEN'T INVITED ME? For shame. All that time, I was living an unfulfilled, sedate life and you all could have SAVED ME FROM MY NAIVETY!
I'm not sure I can ever forgive you.
I never knew about the noise; the flying dirt; the crumpled fenders; the smoke rings (yes, smoke rings) erupting from the wheezing engines; the Buick pummeling the Ford so hard that its front bumper is driven clear under the trunk and into the back seat, requiring the Chevy to come bash them apart with its hood ornament; the tires, still connected to their axles, flying across the arena and becoming just another road hazard to avoid; the car that was 10 feet long when it drove into the arena, and only 6 feet long as it sputtered and lurped its way out, aching with rheumatois arthritis yet beaming with pride...
And all this time I had no idea. Shame on you.
I need to go back. And this time, someone needs to bash Todd Skiba off the cement pylon that the Chevy bashed him up against, pinning his bumper and rendering him so helpless that he dug himself into a foot and a half deep hole trying to rock himself free. He totally would have won. (He's my mechanic, btw, and a rocking good one. Does an amazing job and tells it to you straight and you should all take your cars to Skiba Auto.)
BTW, I totally got beaned. Beaned so hard in the head with a t-shirt that they knotted up until it was hard as a rock and launched with a catapult that I was woozy for a good 5 seconds. I'm just glad Fred had the presence of mind to grab it before it fell under the stands and I lost it. The only thing is, 2 minutes earlier Chuck made me swear on my life as he was heading to the porta-loo that if I won anything I would give it to him.
Atleast I got to keep the welt.
Sunday, August 16, 2009
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2 comments:
Hey Shelane, It's Ryan. If you didn't live so DANG far away, we would have taken you eons ago. My brother drives in the Buckeye demolition derby twice a year. Earlier this year he had three cars in the derby. He drove one, a guy in his ward drove the other, and the third car they rented out to a Greek TV show so they could get some video footage for a sports reality show. If you want to come next time, I think it is going to be in October or close thereby. As for the getting stuck on the side, that exact same thing happened last october to my brothers car. It is so frustrating just watching from the side. Nobody wants to knock them loose because that just means more competition to have to take out again. BTW Heather said to mention that she has never been. (SHE didn't want to come, so don't blame me).
I just have to say that you totally crack me up. Reading your last 5 posts....literally, me laughing out loud. Anyway, I've been wanting to go to a demolition derby but now I guess I missed my chance until next year because my husband decided to conk his head too hard. Ah, well.
Thank you so much for dinner and I apologize for looking right at you on Sunday and not saying anything about it.....I'm totally stressed. But everything is getting better. And your dinner was delicious.
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