rolling down my cheeks as I gracefully cry into the mic and humbly receive the Amazing Mother/Wife of the Eternities award (also know as the - finally got over herself and cleaned the kitchen so she could function, and in the meantime her kids turned out tolerably well despite their mother's efforts - award)
"I'd like to thank Fred for taking all the (screaming, whining) kids with him to grandma's and leaving me wallowing in self pity on the couch for half an hour before I got up and found a dirty rag on the basement floor to clean the kitchen with."
Ironic, that i have to wash a rag in order to wash my kitchen? Not in this house. That's run of the mill. Forget the socks, they come through the wash fine, all 50billion of them. It's the wash rags that get lost.
I'm pretty sure I get bonus points for remembering that it's a waste of time to sweep the floor before I clean off the counters because you know I'm going to wipe the biohazardous material from the counters onto the floor as I clean.
Regaining your sanity by deep cleaning the kitchen doesn't count as breaking the sabbath, right?
My only consolation is my delusion that you are all sitting in front of your computer screens silently agreeing with me, acknowledging my failures with blood and guts stories of your own... about how you have to clean your house uphill 5 miles each day with -5hours of sleep and a dirty diapered child clinging to each leg (and one on your back in the snuggly) just in time for your unappreciative husband to waltz in the back door at 5:15 demanding the home cooked 4 square meal. I feel for you, truly I do. The child stuck to my leg with sucker slobber isn't in diapers and my husband appreciates any little effort I make cleaning or cooking.
I think i'm going to sleep in the kitchen because I can't bear to look at the rest of the house.
5 comments:
you always crack me up!! luckily I have you to pick me so I don't have to wallow in self pity too long. Sadly I can't reciprocate the funny blogs for you, but if I'm ever in the area I'll help you wash your rags.
love you!
I was going to post last night telling about how I removed the "war zone" from my house (on Sunday). I didn't get any pics, so I decided not to. The war zone was the kids bathroom and the only reason it's a war zone is b/c my nephew does not know how to aim... I get cooties when I think about it. I went out on Saturday night and bought new rags, a bucket with a lid and bleach. These items are soley for the use in THAT bathroom. I wore disposable rubber gloves. I told Ryan next time I will wear rubber boots, too. Maybe even a face shield. After a LONG time cleaning, the bathroom was actually shiny--and not b/c of wet pee. Hooray. None of my other jobs got finished though, and Ryan didn't have any clean clothes to wear to work today. Oops! I'm glad I'm not the only one spending hours upon hours cleaning messes when I'd rather be taking a nice long nap.
I am constantly struggling to keep up with everything. I currently have an enormous pile of laundry to get through, dishes piled up in the kitchen,etc.,etc.,
There is an article that I read from time to time to help keep my role of a mother and the state of my house in perspective. It is kind of long but well worth the read.
My Home as a Temple (Is there something Sacred in the Everyday?)
I totally know the feeling of wanting to live in the room you spent SO much time and effort to clean. I wanted to live in my downstairs little bathroom (2 feet by maybe 5 feet) or my upstairs shower. Right now I just want to go back under the covers because there isn't anywhere done right now.
You are so funny. I love reading your posts.
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